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Fix This In Your 20s or Life Will Continue Being Brutal

Are you a millennial?

Research indicates that the millennials (generation of people between 18 and 35) exhibit higher rates of stress, suicide, and depression as compared to any other generation. The annual Stress survey in America by Psychological Association affirms this.

As millennials, we are finding it hard to cope with the normal life struggles and challenges. Especially if you are in your 20’s, you can agree that confusion and lack of clear direction in life is your cup of afflictions.

We are never good at time management, irrational decisions are part of daily life and we rarely understand or how to manage social relations or even how to handle minor conflicts.

The problems we are normally facing seem to be attributed to our inability to handle general life stress. This is coupled with the high expectations they have after college and the sluggish job economy.

Those of us in our early 20s suffer the most. This is because we are often unsure of what the future holds for us. We barely know what we want to do for the rest of our lives.

It is around the same age when the only thing clicking in most of us’ minds is “living life to the fullest.” The YOLO kind of life.

However, the bitter truth is that what we are doing and our lifestyle after college or between 20-27 years in most cases shape our future and level of success in the coming years.

Unfortunately, the age bracket is characterized by the desires to have quick riches with zero patience. We want money but don’t wanna work. No one is willing to start a business that might be worth millions in 5-10 years from now. That is why most people are getting into gambling and shit like that, – quick fixes for everything.

Social media is corrupting our minds. We probably have friends living a posh life on social media but their lives are full of misery offline.

It is for such reasons that most of them get caught up by time and enter the 30s phase with a lot of panic not knowing where to start off.

I mean, all they have been doing is a party every other day, blow money on unnecessary expensive shit. Just trying to look cool to friends. This kind of irrational social and financial decisions often render most helpless and struggling for the rest of their lives.

So how does one get from this state of confusion, irrational decision-making and lack of focus to be self-made millionaires or successful individuals?


Have a Clear Definition of Success

As much as everyone is battling for amassing wealth, we all have different definitions and perceptions of what success really means to us. We all have different goals in life. It is more like a blueprint of what we want in life.

In your 20s, you’re likely to have a vague set of goals. Very people have a clearly defined path of what they want to do in life and come up with strategies to achieve that objective.

I remember not many months have passed since I realized what I want to pursue. Well, it is not like I was still clinging onto that high school BS where all we wanted is to be doctors, engineers, pilots, and other fancy titles. I was past that, I had a couple of things in mind, only that I had not chosen a struggle.

I don’t expect you to be extremely confused in your 20s or even in the 30s. One thing I know though is that if you ask most of these millennials what they want to be. The most definite answer you will get is, “I want to be rich, and happy with a loving family.” Just that, nothing planned or strategic.

Stop living in a fantasy world…

One thing we often forget as the young people is that success is not a destination. Similarly, being rich is not a target. You can’t just say that I want to be rich.

For that reason, you should understand what you need to do in your 20s for a better life in the 30s when responsibilities and commitments start kicking in.

This is how a clearly defined goal or objective should look like:

  • “I want to make $1000 by the end of the coming month.”
  • “I will be working for six days a week.”
  • I want to start a blog by next week”

If you notice those examples above, have deadlines and are quite specific. That is how a workable objective should be.

Just start, it is never too early

People will tell you that it is okay to be lost in your 20s. But I think that is just to give you false hopes (which is perfectly okay).

However, why would you want to be average when you have all it takes to figure out your life early enough and get things rolling?

It is never early to be a millionaire, is it?

Nothing substantial that people will appreciate comes when you’re average. You should be in “lion mode” in everything you are doing. This can only be achieved if you learn to clearly and properly plan your future.

Don’t wait to be ready for you to start figuring out what you should with your life. That day might never come. Just get started, have objectives and keep going. Things will start making sense along the way.

Understand that Motivation is Easy, But Discipline is Difficult.

I have to be honest here. There is a time I used to watch motivation videos on the daily, back to back. I think in the past five months alone, I have probably watched hundreds of them from some of the speakers and successful people I look up to.

While these videos always get me pumped and ready to get shit done. I realized that the motivation was short-lived. I could not stay motivated for days after watching these videos. For this reason, I had to watch several of them, on a daily basis.

But you realize the time I am wasting on watching these videos on the daily could be used to do something substantial.

I later learned that motivation does not last unless you develop appropriate habits and stay disciplined to them.

You can do this by writing down some of the habits or activities that you will need to do every day or now and then to get closer to your goals even faster. Some of them can be:

  • Exercising daily
  • Waking up earlier
  • Managing your time properly
  • Working extra hours….you name it.

Don’t you Quit. Ever!

It is normal that things may go south. Even the most successful people on the planet have experienced disappointments and losses at times. Not always do things go as we anticipated.

However, no matter what, giving up is never the solution. It is never an option.

You can fail as many times as possible, but those should be experiences and learning points to make you more sharp and vigilant in your next moves.

I like some quote I saw the other day that says “I never lose, either I win, or I learn.” This quote hit me right in the feels, it reminds me of how many times I usually think of backing off even at the slightest failure.

If an approach does not work for me, I take a step back, think of a different and better way to deal with the situation. Because you know what, life never gets easier, it is a battle. The brave ones win.

Check out these quotes that will literally give you chills. They will get you pumped.

Family is Always Important.

“Adulting” can be quite interesting and engaging to the extent that we forget some other important issues like family time.

With all the excitements of becoming an adult, facing responsibilities and trying to fall in love, many people often forget that their parents are also growing old.fix-this-in-your-20s

As time is ticking on your side, it is equally ticking on their side, and the strength they had is slowly wearing off.

But family should never be forgotten no matter what. It is easy to neglect their importance, maybe your parents were not good enough, or have their shortcomings, but that does not call for you to be rebellious or completely forget about them.

There are some people who yearn for the chance to have a family, but it is not possible. So if you are lucky to have one or both parents alive, make sure you take good care of them.

Give them all the support and respect they deserve.

It is important to take time off your busy work schedule and create family time. It is these small things that often keep them happy and maybe adding a couple more years to their lives.

Family should come first before work.

It is hard when you’re in your 20s and your friends you finished college together seem to be successful or ahead of you. The virtue of patience is unlikely to cross your mind. You never think of how much time you have left. You, therefore, try to work so hard to buy a car or the expensive things you are seeing with your peers to compensate for your inferiority feelings.

However, even as you are trying to be successful, never prioritize work over your family. The boss you are working so hard for doesn’t care about you, he only cares about his money. But at the end of the day, when you have a problem, it is your family that will help you out, sometimes even your friends might disappear.

Richard Feloni says in his Business Insider article that your company or employer will easily replace you but your family won’t.

Never Stop Learning

It is quite unfortunate that most of us young people do not have time for books, magazines or anything that pertains reading.

Our attention has been diverted into reading texts and scrolling through texts and Facebook posts all day long. I understand it is very easy to ditch books once you are through with college or high school.

However, “Learning is a continuous process.” This is what my high school teacher used to tell us. That no matter what level you are at in this life, you should always find time to improve yourself by learning from other’s experiences and the best way to do this is to keep reading constantly.

Reading is an important practice and habit that we should all adopt since through it, we get vital insights and strategies to handle various issues that affect our day to day lives. This can include relationship, financial, health or even social matters.

In fact, books will teach you a lot of beneficial stuff that you will never learn from your teachers or school.

On mentors and role models, I know you’re probably wondering where to get one or how even to befriend those guys you are looking up to. Note that you don’t have to necessarily befriend Bill Gates, Warren Buffet or Elon Musk.

Chances are you might not have the opportunity even to see them physically in your/their entire life. But you can always learn from them by reading the thousands of books out here giving a narration on their biographies as well as their success stories.

You can use those materials to learn their success rules, tips, as well as their mistakes and you, can avoid them. This is how you can learn from them as mentors.

You can also learn through life experiences and don’t rely much on your passion. Travel more while in your 20s. Have time with your friends and learn from them, that is how you figure out what to do and what to avoid.  Not everything is found on Google.

Teach Yourself to Budget and Save Money in Your 20s

Planning is almost impossible for the young people. It is even harder for that to happen when all you keep thinking about is blowing your paychecks on booze and partying uncontrollably.

Can you relate with this meme?


Learning to manage your finances while young is a priceless lesson everyone ought to master. Proper financial management is, in fact, the surest way to avoid getting into debts.

I recommend you to read the Rich Dad Poor Dad by Richard Kiyosaki, that book made me view life in a whole different perspective.

Hold up, by asking you to master and practice saving and planning ahead; I didn’t mean that you live the monk-lifestyle. Naah! You should not deny yourself everything just in the name of saving for the future.

If you are earning some a few bucks that can sustain you, it is good to go for vacations once in a while, eat good food and get you some trending clothes.

After all, why should you work your butt off to make money if you cannot afford to give yourself a good but reasonable lifestyle?

As I said, it is all about mastering how to plan your finances wisely.

That’s all for today. I’m out!

*throws my laptop out through the window* ✌️


What have you learned in your 20s that you think prepares you for rest of your life? Let me know in the comments below.


Article written by:

Omari Alex is the founder of Freelance Nuggets. Learn more about him in the "About" page and connect with him on any of these social media platforms.